Saying the Quiet Part Out Loud
Tip lavishly, for openers. It's a thing you can actually do, not just talk about, that will help a thousand people over the course of your life.
Eh... don't get me started. There are people who should not be working in any 'service' industry because they have no idea what 'service' means. These are the ones complaining about poor tips. Those who complain about being 'required' to tip and suggest that servers should be paid at least minimum wage are their brethren. Don't get me wrong -- I generally tip 15% for relatively poor service, 20% for mostly good. When I take my family out to eat, a server who treats my grandchildren kindly and with respect will likely get 25%... or more. (We do not allow the children to run amuck or be otherwise disrespectful, but we do allow them to place their own orders. The waiter who didn't bat an eye when the 5-year-old ordered grilled salmon got a bit extra. Yes, he did seek approval from an adult, but did so with respect to the child.)Much of this problem now is related to delivery services, how the website is set up, and corporate policies. I've stopped using all doordash-type delivery services (that doesn't include pizza delivery service which has been in place for years). Back, hip, knee, and other joint disorders had me using Instacart and Shipt long before the pandemic hit. I prefer Shipt because they allow me to tip after the delivery and to designate preferred shoppers. That way I can take into consideration how much time is spent actually shopping for me. The tip increases when I make special requests such as sliced deli meat which takes more time and I appreciate the communication that Shipt allows its shoppers. Instacart is much more "locked down" in that area, ultimately penalizing their delivery staff.
As a person who once worked as a waiter, my wife too, we have always been 25%ers for decent service. Extraordinary service would get 30%.Buffet type restaurants where you get your own food were the exception, but we're worth laying a fiber on the table at the end of the meal for fetching drink refills and clearing used plates in a timely manner.Only twice have I not left a tip. Once was when we went to Bar Harbor, Maine and spent over a 100 bucks for the family. The service sucked. It took forever to give our drink order, which was quickly forgotten by the server, then another interminable amount of time before we could order our food. Then the food finally arrived, some of it wrong and most of it cold...and we still didn't have our drinks or any silverware. Complaint to management didn't elicit any sympathy or deduction on the bill. If Yelp had been a thing back then, I would have given them negative stars.Another time was at a buffet we used to frequent twice a month for several years. They got new management and new servers. Again with the lack of silverware and no drinks.
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