I have noted in my Underground DSM-IV (I have not updated)
that the substance abuser who says they will do “whatever it takes” to get
sober is not to be believed. I had
noticed that purely empirically over the years, but had no explanation. Early in my minor ordeal of having to keep my
head face down for a week I was frustrated and wanted to sit up more, but knew
I had to maintain the uncomfortable posture for the sake of my future eyesight. I found myself thinking that very phrase
“whatever it takes,” and chuckled to myself that I was doing what I had
criticized others for. But this time I
knew in a moment how people could say it with sincerity, yet it was still
wrong. It’s a different type of
discipline, a different type of courage. One says “whatever it takes” to get up
to fever pitch. It’s for a one-shot
deal, a moment’s intense courage or determination. Go ahead! Pull the bone into
place! Make the call! Leap the brook! But that is not the type of
determination that is needed to get sober or to remain in an uncomfortable
position another day. It is not a matter
of amount, it is different in quality.
Fever pitch won’t get you sober.
Saying “whatever it takes,” then, is not a matter of
deceiving oneself or others. But it does
mean you don’t understand what is being asked of you.
2 comments:
"This too shall pass" seems better.
"I can defer gratification" is the one I wish I could tell myself with more confidence. You know the saying, "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels"? The problem is that it tastes good now and thin is an abstract good in the future. After you lose some weight, sure, it's easy to look back and say "the tastes I missed weren't that important, and it's great to look and feel better now," but that's not really the point when you're declining dessert.
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