Saturday, December 15, 2012

Impulsive Solutions

Crap.  I had a post that kicks someone deservedly, but might hurt another reader.

She deserves it, too, but she's a nice person who has done me no harm and some good, so even if her idea is contemptible I don't want to hurt her.

So just take my word for it - I knocked it outa the park.


MaxedOutMama said...

Er, I don't know how to respond? Even mentally.

If you have a reader with a bad idea, maybe a slightly more tactful restatement of your thesis that showed why her idea is a bad idea would be an act of respect for that reader?

I don't come here to have my own ideas affirmed. I don't even comment much. I am a steady reader because I think your way of backing off and squinting at life in a questioning manner has great value to it. It's a constant reminder that although I am getting old and creaky, I need not let myself get osteoarthritis of the mind and personality.

I suspect you are insulting this reader rather than being respectful of her.

GraniteDad said...

Mama, I don't think he knows how to do a tactful restatement... that ship has sailed.

terri said...

If it's it.

There is no idea to which I am permanently attached to right now....more like a constant state of flux. Though I am not sure if I "deserve" anything just for having a thought or expressing an opinion someone else thinks is bad.

RIght now my general mood is one of " Meaningless, Meaningless, everything is meaningless"...."chasing after the wind".

terri said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sam L. said...

Is that passive-aggressive, or agressively passive?

Assistant Village Idiot said...

No, terri, it's not you. I have confidence you have the strength to be disagreed with, even untactfully, because you have shown that over the years.

My general mood is similar at this point, and thus - a comment which even I don't know is ironic or not - sort of like the very title of the blog. I am announcing how noble I am of spirit to forbear from dueling with the unarmed and generally well-meaning. I am also making fun of myself for that arrogance.

It's quite strange, and my children and their friends may be able to describe it, years after I am gone, better than I ever will now. But humility and conceit are very close to the same thing in me.

I wrote three posts about self-righteousness and the reflexive commentary people have had about the shootings in Newtown. (All different.) Any one of the three could have been hurtful to someone. Because there isn't really any good way to say "Your own words betray that you don't really care about this issue, what you care about is the moral posturing you get to do." I went after some typical gun/anti-gun people, some mental-health blatherers of various ilk, plus some surprising targets that you wouldn't normally think were in this. Just before "publish," I resolved to wait an hour each time. An hour later, I repented and erased all my brilliant, witty, ironclad stuff. Rinse, repeat.

See the brief, newest post for what I have pared down to.

terri said...

Great. Now I look like a total narcissist, thinking that everything is a hidden message concerning me!

I'll take my tinfoil hat off now.

Assistant Village Idiot said...

rotfl - When I wrote that, I did think "gee, I wonder if terri is going to think I mean her." Which means either

a) you're not a narcissist, or
b) I already knew you were a narcissist.

bs king said...

" and my children and their friends may be able to describe it, years after I am gone, better than I ever will now. But humility and conceit are very close to the same thing in me."

Yeah, that's about right.

After observing you for about 2 decades, I note your typical thought process (at least expressed thought process) seems to go like this:
1. Here is my point.
2. Here is why it is better than the opposing view.
3. In addition to it not being my view, here's why the other view is wrong.
4. While I'm at it, here's what delusions I believe people with the opposing view have, and they totally don't get this.
5. Pause
6. Here's where I probably have those delusions too.
7. I'm still right.
8. I definitely have those delusions.
9. I'm definitely right though.

I might make a copy of this for Jonathan and Ben, so they can put a placard of it on the door to your room in the nursing home some day. Seems like people should know who they're dealing with up front.

Assistant Village Idiot said...

Wow. It's a fair cop.

GraniteDad said...

Bethany nails it in one! Please have it encased in lucite for posterity.

MaxedOutMama said...

Yep, she's got you pinned down.

Except that life does force us to take positions on things, so there's nothing wrong with your way of doing it. Your way of doing it might be the best that humans can do.

That's the wonderful thing about democracy - we are all free to muddle along toward our best conclusion, vote/act/advocate for that position, and then even free to hope that if we are wrong, the majority will overrule us.