Dealing With The Public

People can name their children whatever they want.  It's a free country, as we used to say.  But today's plaintive communication reminds us that our actions have consequences.  "...the hubris of Caleys, Caitlyns, Madelines, and Adelines assuming we know how to spell their names at the library desk when everyone knows there are approximately 54 different spellings..." If you give your child a name that people do not automatically how to spell, then the child will encounter the misunderstanding and slowing down of interaction with others. That is going to happen. "If you didn't want to go to Chicago, why did you get on the train?" as Garrison Keillor said in another context.

I recall a sendup from a decade ago of a supposed White Girl Magazine,  which had on its cover a teaser headline "14 New Spellings For Caitlyn!" It has always been with us, of course.  I went to elementary school with a girl whose name was pronounced Jo-Ann, but spelled Joan. Some of the teachers insisted on pronouncing it as "Joan," all year long. (Yes, remember what these teachers were like in the Good Olde Days, who were always right even when they were numb as a hake?) I don't know if her mother ever regretted it, but the poor woman has had a lifetime of people mispronouncing her name.  She resorted to Jo'an for a while in an attempt to signal to people which was correct - because all of us at school didn't have a clue from one year to the next.

It does affect other people.  It affects the children who have standard spellings, as they now have to spell their names anyway. There no longer is a standard spelling, regardless of history. You can do what you want, but the more friction you create, the more friction you're going to get.