Feminine Products

 Sarah is in 7th grade, and today the boys in her class were all bent out of shape that the girls have a "vending machine" in their bathroom.  But the boys don't. This absolutely slays me.

Now that she and Aurora have reached that age, and as far as I can tell the next two granddaughters are completely oblivious and will never provide me with the setup line, I will pass along to you a humorous response I have been diligently saving for at least ten years.  I envision a girl of about 8 or 9 coming back from a shared bathroom - say, at a doctor's office or a small church or a dive bar while traveling and asking the table "What are feminine products?"

And I would seriously say "Cats. They want to make sure that no one flushes any cats down the toilet."  Alas, the odds were always poor and are now minuscule that I will ever get to use it, so I give it out to you on the off-chance that one of you gets to use it someday. "Free to all finders, birds, beasts, Elves or men, and all kindly creatures."