Friday, March 21, 2008

Branding

Political campaigns are about establishing your brand, I'm told. Brands are stand-ins for serious ideas. At best, they're synedoches. More usually, they're just lies. Let's have some fun with this.

Obama is definitely a Prius, right? Hillary claims to be a minivan, but is maybe a Volvo or Mercedes.

And McCain - not a Hummer...A Jeep, maybe? Or maybe he used to drive a Jeep but now a Lincoln. A restored Camaro? I'm not reading these brands as well as I'd like. Ron Paul is a 56 Chevy because you can repair the thing yourself, dammit, and you should. Mike Huckabee a "used" pickup truck that turns out to be a 2007 Dodge Ram 3500 diesel. But biodiesel, and with a fish on it.

Help me out here. Have fun with it. Kucinich? Romney?

13 comments:

Michael said...

Kucinich is a 1973 VW Beetle. I think 1973 is around when he was first elected mayor of Cleveland and I don't think his views have changed much since.

Gringo said...

Kucinich- an old VW van, in a faded hippie paint job. I thought this before I saw the first comment.

Romney: a Mercury or Crown Victoria.

bs king said...

Romney is a definitely some sort of SVU....not really a truck, not really a minivan, not really high performance vehicle, but trying to be all three. Also just rolls over when you put to much pressure on him.

Michael said...

Gringo

Just goes to show that Kucinich evokes similar thoughts in us - your Van might be a tad better than my beetle.

Cappy said...

Kucinich is an Edsel.

Great Uncle Jonathan said...

Romney is a sleek, black Mercedes like the bad guys drive in European movies, Ron Paul has got to be an AMC Gremlin McCain is a 68 Caddy. Kucinich is VW but not a Beetle; maybe a squareback.

Anonymous said...

Kucinich is VW but not a Beetle; maybe a squareback.

No, I vote for the VW "Thing," that beach buggy wantabe.

akafred

cold pizza said...

Romney drives a BMW (Big Mormon Wagon). I picture him in a Hummer3, looks tough but it's just sheet metal on a GMC chassis. Maybe an Avalance; y'know, the one that changes from truck to SUV back to truck again.

Obama drives a black towncar with a white interior and a CD case filled with gangsta rap.

Hillary! drives one of those baggage trains used at the airport. Of course, everyone around her pretends it's a Mercedez M-Class and she believes it because she's never had to actually drive her own car for like 80 years or something.

Ron Paul and Kucinich carpool in a gray '74 Volvo plastered with "Nader '80" bumper stickers.

McCain drives a no frills Crown Victoria, just like the state police have. In fact, McCain bought his CV at a state surplus auction and the car had definately seen better days. A little body work, some fresh paint and no one would ever know it had flipped end-over-end.

Huckabee drives a U-Haul truck with a loudspeaker mounted on the top.

Bill Clinton drives a beat-up pickup truck (when the media is around). When no one is watching he's got this sweet new red sports car (the model is constantly changing).

I drive a green Ford explorer XL. Read into that what you will. -cp

Assistant Village Idiot said...

cold pizza is tough on everyone, it seems. That's the way it should be.

Al Gore drives a Rolls with the RR pried off and a Prius logo stuck in its place.

Gringo said...

The funniest was AVI's "carbon-friendly" Rolls Royce for Al Gore: just like the electric bill at his house!

Modify Kucinich's VW Van to have a psychedelic paint job put on in 1968 and nothing added to it since.

bs king said...

No AVI, Gore drives a Prius with the engine removed and a RR engine stuck in. How else do you explain his son getting busted in a Prius going 100 mph???? I've driven a Prius....that's just not possible.....

Jerub-Baal said...

Hmmm, I'd have to say that the Dem
Party is a corvette...
... with a '72 Vega engine. Trying to be everyone's dream, but nothing to make it go in the real world.

Oh, wait, I'm channelling IMAO here...

Fred Thompson is this!

Assistant Village Idiot said...

Hmm, J-B. Maybe the batmobile for Thompson